Return To Innocence
by interpol
Summary: (Season 2) As time goes on, people change. We all wish we could go back in time to fix mistakes. Unfortunately that is impossible. We all need to learn how to heal. (Many odd couples. DON'T read if you like takari, taiora, mimato..and the list goes on)


&&&&&&&&&&Funeral For Hope&&&&&&&&&&

Never in my life will I forget those moments. Never will I forget how I felt, or what I saw, what I smelled, and what I tasted… never.

"You guys have a good time, all right?" Matt leaned against the doorway, smiling at his mother and father, who were sitting on suitcases.

"It's not like you GAVE us a choice!" laughed Mr. Ishida.

TK sat Indian-style on the couch, looking around at everyone. For once, as long as he could remember, they were all together. They were all a family; and this was just the beginning.

"I can't thank you enough for this Matt and TK…" Nancy Takaishi said, sniffling. She had the most grateful smile on her face.

Matt shrugged. "Where did you think I was blowing off all my gig money on? Girls?"

TK joined in the teasing. "Yeah, mom, and what did you think I was doing while I was always at the flower shop? It was my summer job."

Mr. Ishida raised an eyebrow. "I thought it was because you liked that Sora girl…"

Ms. Takaishi giggled when she saw TK turn a light pink. Matt rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest, deciding to change the subject for the sake of his brother.

It was almost perfect. I've been saving up with Matt for months; however, we've been planning this for years. We would send mom and dad on a trip to Hawaii; all expenses paid, courtesy of yours truly… and Matt, of course.

The trip wasn't even meant to happen for a while. After all, we've only been saving up for months; but it was by the most fortunate yet unfortunate coincidences that that one day I was watching TV, I would have stumbled across a commercial, advertising a plane trip to Hawaii… for 1/3 the price that we had anticipated on, and we could pay monthly, rather than full up front. It was perfect…

…And it changed everything. Totaling up the money that we had saved so far, we had found that we could make three months of the payment, and they could leave ASAP. After that, we could pay off the rest monthly, which wouldn't be a problem since Matt's band had been raking in the gigs and money lately.

I could never forget their faces when we called an emergency 'family' meeting in the Takaishi household. They sat on the same couch, though of course separated by a good three feet, the invisible barrier that was always between them. Matt had waltzed in, acting goofier than usual, and wearing a flower printed shirt and khaki shorts with a lei draped around his shoulders.

'What is going on?' Mom wondered, a confused look on her face. Dad looked at Matt with equal confusion. I tried to keep my laughter in, but I couldn't help it and giggled uncontrollably. Matt pointed at them with both of his hands and said 'How would you guys like an all-expenses PAID trip to the fabulous Hawaii!'

'Er, it sounds good I guess… are you feeling okay?…' Dad said, of course with uncertainty in his voice. Mom didn't say a word. She figured we were both up to something, but she couldn't put her finger on it. I felt an overwhelming sense of excitement, even though I wasn't going on the trip.

'Well, today's your lucky day!' Matt said enthusiastically. He paused, then added, 'Under two conditions…'

'What would those be, then?' Mom asked, looking at Matt with a raised eyebrow. Now dad didn't say anything.

'One… you have to leave by next month, and two… you would have to go with dad, mom.'

'Um… sounds wonderful Matt,' mom said, pausing and looking at dad. She continued, 'but where can we find such a trip?' Mom asked, her eyebrow still raised.

It was my turn to say something. I stood up and cleared my throat to get their attention. They both looked at me, and I walked up to them, holding up the tickets to their faces. 'I believe this is the part where you either faint, or ground us for buying tickets to Hawaii without your permission.'

Needless to say, they did both. But after a few weeks of considering it, and the fact that they couldn't get a refund on the tickets because of the no return policy… they had no choice but to go. At first they acted like they didn't want to, but they were going to go because they 'had to.'

…Bullshit. Matt and I could tell that they wanted to go, and they were just looking for excuses. We could tell that they wanted to be together, even for a short time. We could tell that they wanted to try to patch things up, but never had the opportunity.

This was their opportunity. Their opportunity given to them by us.

I curse myself every day for it.

"Hurry up! You're going to miss your taxi!" Matt urged, pushing mom and dad out the door.

"Are you sure you'll be able to take care of TK? Don't go out! We'll call you! Don't stay up too late! Don't answer the door if you don't know who it is! Wash your hands every few hours! Don't"

TK laughed, crumpling up a paper ball and throwing it to his parents. "Yeah, yeah! Get your asses outta here!"

Mr. Ishida smiled. "We'll be back before you know it."

Nancy Takaishi couldn't stop crying. As she left, she turned around and looked at them.

"I love you, take care!"

I hear what some people say, that a parent's worst nightmare was outliving their child… But what about a child's worst nightmare? Is it of the boogeyman, or the scary ghost, or the monster under the bed that was actually a green sweater…No. It was outliving their parents. Without them, where is the guidance? Where is the love? Even if older people of nineteen or twentysomething consider themselves to be on their own… they aren't. There's always mom and/or dad, and they always have your back, no matter what.

"Geez, looks like it's just you and me TK! Let's start by throwing a party and getting drunk! It is a Friday night!" Laughed Matt. He was smiling.

Typical Matt, turning something serious into a joke. He couldn't stop smiling… I remember…

After that, he never smiled again.

BRRING! BRRING! BRRING!

"GET THE FUCKING PHONE!" TK yelled. It was six in the morning on a Saturday. Who dare called at this hour? He groaned and covered his head with the pillow, in a fruitless attempt to drown out the noises and try and get back to sleep. Sleep…

He flinched when he heard his door open. "Five more minutes, Matt…" TK said, yawning.

Matt clenched the phone in his hand. A few moments passed, and he let out a cry and threw the phone against the wall, it breaking into pieces.

TK sat up straight and looked at the bits of the phone that was scattered on the floor. "What's your problem!" he yelled.

No response.

"…Matt?"

The older boy dropped onto the floor on his knees, sobbing uncontrollably.

"Matt! What happened!"

"…TK… mom and dad's flight…"

Those words explained it all. I could feel myself choking, as if some invisible man was grabbing hold on me and I couldn't do anything to stop it.

"…Plane crash…No survivors…"

I was sixteen years old.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

The funeral was on a bleak rainy day. All of the digidestined were there. I don't remember what happened. There were a few teary testimonials from mom and dad's old friends.

I felt better when the funeral was over.

Mom and dad were to be buried next to each other. The irony was great. Here, they were going to Hawaii to patch things up to try and be together, and in the end… the dead end… they ended up together in death.

Since Matt was old enough to be my legal guardian, it was done so. He moved in with me, since it was a bigger space and better living accommodations.

The first few weeks were awkward. We didn't speak. We left mom's room as it was and cleaned up every chance possible, as if expecting her to come back. We were still blind to the fact that she was not coming back. That dad was not coming back. That we were by ourselves.

The weeks that followed were worse. Sometimes I would go days without seeing Matt, and when I did, he came home at three AM in a drunken state. How he got the alcohol, I don't even know. But it didn't matter. It didn't matter that he wasn't home, either. What mattered is that every time he was drunk, he continued to call me dad. And it broke my heart every time he did. He was so drunk that he thought that mom and dad was still alive. 'Dad, I got the mail today! I've got straight A's!'

I told him that he had to stop this. That he had to stop living in a cloud of ignorance. That he had to stop drinking. He knew that it was a vain attempt to blind himself from the truth, but he didn't care.

He didn't listen to me. He got worse. Months passed, and he always looked old and tired. The three hundred thousand that was left our insurance was gone. Matt took it all. I know it. I never touched the money. He was the one who bought groceries; that's why the refrigerator was always empty. He was the one paying electricity, which is why it was always dark. He was the one. Always.

The Matt I knew was long gone, and I couldn't get him back. Only mom and dad could.

One day, I stayed at a cram session with Davis and Ken. I figured Matt wouldn't even notice that I was gone. As I was walking home, a block away from the house, several police cars and an ambulance passed by me, sirens wailing.

I thought nothing of it. It was ten o'clock and all I wanted to do was sleep. The sirens didn't get any quieter. They got louder. I felt my heart jump up to my throat. Something was wrong. Soon, I was jogging… then running… and then sprinting as if the devil were after me.

My fears were confirmed. Several police cars were parked in front of an apartment complex. My apartment complex. I ran over to one of the police men, who was writing down something on a notepad. 'What happened?' I remember asking.

'Are you lost, kid?'

'I live here! What happened!'

'A guy was found dead.'

'What? What happened!'

'Sorry kid, I can't reveal any of that information.'

I pushed through the gaping crowd, most of them my neighbors, out of the way. I saw people in white suits standing outside the entrance. They made some hand motions. A stretcher was carried out.

There was a body on top of it. I knew who it was.

Following the stretcher were some detectives. I squinted, seeing one of them holding a plastic bag with an empty orange bottle. The wheeled the body into an ambulance, but everyone knew that the person wasn't coming back. And you know who that person was?

It was Matt. He had committed suicide by taking an overdose of sleeping pills.

I don't know what happened after that, nothing was important anymore.

I cursed Matt at his funeral. I cursed him for starting this whole mess. I cursed him for making mom and dad die. I cursed him for dying. And I cursed him for leaving me alone.

I was placed in foster care to one of my distant relatives, who lived a good three hours drive away from Odaiba. I didn't care.

The days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, months into years.

And here I am now, Takeru Takaishi, a college drop out with a pathetic life and a bleak future. No longer the child of hope. No longer a child.

It's been three years since the death of my hope and my family. I never got over it…

And I never will.

&&&&&&&&


End file.
